Vote For Me, I Dindu Nuffin!

Some news headlines could only belong to Detroit and this is one of them. It is not an Onion satirical piece but I did double check.

Half of Detroit’s 8 mayoral candidates are felons

Four have been convicted of felonies. Does that mean the other four were acquitted? This is Detroit so of course the four are black. Oddly three of the felons are women with gun charges.

Danetta L. Simpson says:

“I was a wrongfully convicted felon, overcharged for a crime I did not commit,” said Simpson, a mother of four, who contends the witness in the case “lied on me.”

Dindu nuffin! Overcharged? Like the butter was supposed to be on sale but it rang up at full price? Lied on her? Lied about her or fell asleep on her?

Donna Marie Pitts also has a string of offenses...but as you might guess, she dindu nuffin!

Most recently, Pitts was convicted of firearm possession and carrying a concealed weapon under a March 2003 plea agreement stemming from a traffic stop in Dearborn Heights, Wayne County Circuit Court records show.  

Pitts was stopped by police on Dec. 2, 2002, on Ford near Norborne for an improper plate and failure to wear a seat belt.

A .38 caliber handgun — which Pitts said belonged to her sister — was found on the front floor board of the truck. She was ordered to serve 40 to 60 months in prison in April 2003. She was paroled in August 2006, according to the Michigan Department of Corrections.

Ah, the old "My sister left her gun in my car" ploy! My sisters often leave firearms in my vehicles without telling me. This will be a theme.

Articia Bomer, "a document specialist who touts a culinary background and musical talents" is another champion of law and order.

The 45-year-old said her conviction is “frivolous” and “wrong.” It isn’t her focus and she doesn’t believe “that should hinder me.”

Court records note Bomer was approached by police while sitting in a 1987 Oldsmobile Cutlass parked at the curb in the 9300 block of Whitcomb on July 25, 2008. A search turned up a .38 caliber piston with four live rounds. Bomer said the weapon was not hers.

She said she had just purchased the vehicle, the prior owner was a gun-carrier and several others had been driving the car.

Car seller pro tip: be sure you take any loose change and unaccounted for firearms out of your car before you sell it. Articia also dindu nuffin.

Oddly enough Curtis Christopher Greene, the lone male convicted felon running for mayor, is also the only one who seems to own up to his criminal past and has taken steps to better himself, as opposed to being a former cosmetologist, document specialist or culinary artist.

Now lest you think this is an occasion to mock Detroit for a news story that could only come from Detroit, this is actually a strength of Detroit!

Political consultant Greg Bowens said there are candidates with past hardships in every election cycle. It’s not something unique to Detroit or the political arena in general, he said.

“Black marks on your record show you have lived a little and have overcome some challenges,” said Bowens, a former press secretary to Detroit Mayor Dennis Archer and NAACP activist. “They (candidates) deserve the opportunity to be heard, but they also deserve to have the kind of scrutiny that comes along with trying to get an important elected position.”

"Blacks marks". Lol.

How did we survive this long as a nation without convicts running the joint?

None of these people will be the next mayor but it is revealing of the mindset of places like Detroit. Nothing is my fault, it is always the fault of someone else. I dindu nuffin, it was my sister's gun, it was in the car when I bought it, I wuz "overcharged", they "lied on me".

This week the 100% guaranteed to win an Oscar film Detroit is being released and it is sure to be an hours long exercise in blaming Whitey. 50 years later the Whites have all left Detroit and it is a laughingstock, a name synonymous with urban decay and in less PC circles the epitome of the results of black self-governance. Instead of a biased racial agitation film about an event 50 years ago or tearing down Confederate war memorials, maybe blacks could have serious conversations about their own culpability in the perpetual state of disarray, poverty, ignorance and violence they find themselves in decade after decade. We collectively dindu nuffin might be a convenient response when getting arrested but it has been a disaster for the black community and is only getting worse.